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Wrestler Name: Chris Messiah

Hometown: Belfast, the Emerald Isle

Entrance Theme: "Don't You Forget About Me" by Simple Minds

Height: 6'0"

Weight: 229

Years Pro: 5

Frequently Used Moves
1. Atomic Drop
2. Manhattan Drop
3. Back Breaker
4. Snap Suplex
5. Neck Breaker
6. Side Russian Leg Sweep
7. Rib Breaker
8. Scoop Slam
9. Sleeper Hold
10.Pile Driver

Finisher Set-Up: Gravity Grave (Handshake DDT)

Finisher Name: Reality Check

Finisher Description: An elevated Texas cloverleaf with Chris' knee jarring into the back of the opponent's neck.

History: Chris has a medium kind of build. He's not muscley but he's not skinny either. In other words, he works out a lot but doesn't use steroids. He has longish and unkempt dirty fair/brown hair with some sideburns that need a good trimming. He wears black elbow pads and white tape on his wrists, and also black knee pads but you can't see them because he's got some tasty black tights on that come down to his ankles, with white and blue lines down the seams. He wears blue boots with white laces and soles. His attire is finished off with a fitted grey t-shirt that has the Messiah emblem on the front. It's the same as the Superman one except the S is changed for the M. Chris doesn't worry about being sued because he doesn't have any money anyway.

Biography: Oh, to be young again. And also a girl. Christopher J. Messiah popped out of his mother on April Fools Day, 1975. My calculator tells me that 25 years later at the age of 25, Chris decided to become a professional wrestler. He spotted a worthless plug in July 2000 for a wrestling federation at his The Rock appreciation Yahoo! Club and decided to check it out. 10 minutes later, he had filled out the job application for Great Plains Wrestling and was well on his way to fulfilling his lifelong dream for the past 10 minutes.

His first match at GPW wasn't very good. He was jobbed out to some guy who had something money-related in his name. In his second encounter, he also lost. But then he won! And he kept on winning until he won the GPW World Heavyweight championship, defeating the Undertaker because the Dead Man forgot to role-play for the match. He was probably too busy wrestling for the WWF at the time. The following month after his title win, the President of GPW informed Chris that he would be losing the title at the following PPV "just to keep everybody happy." This didn't make Chris happy however, so he took the title belt and ran away, never to return.

After a successful 3 months in the business, Chris decided to open his own promotion, called the World Championship Wrestling Federation, in October 2000. Chris sat back and let the action unfold before his eyes, happy in his retirement from active competition after his gruelling career in the ring. But Chris soon got bored and came out of retirement, the highlight of his comeback being finishing joint second in the January 2001 battle royal PPV match, Indefinite Failure. Chris realised that the WCWF sucked and it was shut down forever and ever, apart from one weekend when he was bored and considered reopening it.

Chris then resurfaced in the International Wrestling Corporation with several of his WCWF buddies, Lowest Common Denominator, Joe Soap, and some other guy called Amadeus who nobody can remember. Together they were known as the C-Team. They promptly cleaned up within the IWC, as Chris won the Atlantic championship on his debut and followed it with the International championship and the Tag Team championship. But things soon started falling apart when the C-Team lost Amadeus. Nobody knows what happened to that guy. After some ridiculous booking to accommodate a returning legend, Chris quit the IWC after losing a World Heavyweight championship tournament semi-final casket match. The agent for the match wanted Chris to be super-kicked into the casket after 30 seconds of the match, so Chris knew the writing was on the wall and promptly jobbed in 15 seconds instead too make people feel even more sorry for him. In his last IWC match at the following Pay-Per-View, Whiplash, Chris did some politicking backstage and had LCD inserted into his International championship match with The X, and Chris jobbed the title to LCD much in the same way as Steve Austin did to Mick Foley at Summerslam 1999 because he didn't want to drop the title to Triple H.

Chris then decided to have another crack at running a promotion. He opened up the British Wrestling Corporation and it went on to have some success. Chris decided to screw around with the head of the biggest bad guy in the BWC, costing him the BWC World Heavyweight championship after an awesome tournament for the title. Chris then went on holiday for 3 weeks and when he came back, the BWC had changed. It was now overrun with a load of people that Chris didn't know. And then a promotion called Titanium Wrestling popped up and most of the roster left to go there. Chris did the honourable thing and closed the BWC. And then he did the even more honourable thing and jumped ship to TW himself, so he could beat the balls off the traitors that left him all alone with no friends in BWC. Chris' good friend Anders Nova was good friends with the TW owner and Chris promptly got put over his former vice president, comically known as "Wez," in outrageous fashion to win the BWC Commonwealth championship, which had been brought over to TW from BWC. He then won the number one contendership for the BWC World Heavyweight championship to take back what was rightfully his, but the TW owner did a runner and TW closed. Chris was outraged and also a hypocrite.

Chris then appeared again in January 2002 after his girlfriend dumped him and he was going through an emo stage in his adolescence. After a few wins in his new promotion, Icon Wrestling Federation, Chris got jobbed out to a long-time IWF favourite and Chris left in disgust, pretending he was busy with school work.

He then appeared yet again in a promotion called Excite Pro Wrestling. There was nothing exciting or professional about it. They used a simulator to write their matches! The quality of the opposition was so poor that Chris out-role-played an opponent without even role-playing at all. He decided to leave after less than a month and was kindly inducted into the EPW Hall of Shame.

He then created the brilliant promotion, aptly entitled LOSER. Chris was once again the brains behind the operations, however he couldn't get many people on board and it promptly closed soon after opening. Chris was just one big gigantic loser himself. Then he joined Main Event Wrestling, a fledgling promotion that shut before it even had its first show.

Then it gets good. It was in the summer of 2002 while working the night shift at Burger King that Chris slipped in the bathroom while hanging a clock on the wall and had a vision! And that vision was of travelling through time... zones to America and starting his own wrestling promotion. Fair enough, he'd opened (and closed) quite a few by this stage in his career, but this time it would be different! Oh, who am I kidding?

Chris realised his previous short-comings were because nobody liked him. His previous endeavours fell flat on their faces because any time he tried starting something wonderful himself, nobody would jump on the bandwagon. So he sat at home drawing up a devious plan to create a successful wrestling promotion, with him as one of the cornerstones of it. The catch? Nobody would ever know!

Chris began auditioning actors to play the parts of Wendel Maculatum and Thomas Stubbs, for they would be the Chairman and CEO of the Championship Wrestling Organization. Take time to notice the American-esque "Z" in Organization rather than an "S" like it's supposed to be spelled. It was this kind of attention to detail that was going to mean big things for the cWo!

By early October 2002, Chris had everything in place - a long-winded back-story that was complete bullshit, a roster packed with every worthless jobber he could lay his hands on and an expensive countdown clock just in case anybody needed it for their debut. He even paid a bunch of hobos off the street to pose as members of the cWo Hall of Fame. Hall of Lame (BAM!) would have been more apt.

They came from far and wide to see the cWo put on the inaugural television show, Paranoia. Chris secretly pulled the strings while all the time pretending to be nothing more than a clueless member of the roster, a role which he played to perfection. Little did the rest of them know that he was the "brains" behind the operation! After 10 fantastic shows including a groundbreaking PPV where Chris won the cWo Rising Star championship, the cWo was really going places. It was just before the 10th edition of Paranoia that the wheels began to fall off. Chris had talked to the management, or to be exact, he'd talked to himself, and decided to set up a big surprise for Paranoia. For weeks the aforementioned countdown clock had been randomly counting down the days, hours, minutes and possibly seconds until... something. Chris had decided that it was going to be nothing more than Chris himself returning from a three week layoff through injury. But oh no, other members of the roster were having none of it.

"Wasabi!" was the outraged outburst from the reigning cWo Heavyweight champion whyttrash. "Where's the bathroom around here?!" quizzed Phil Atken. "He's too lazy to deserve it!" came the cry from Ike Rogers, who asked not to be identified. Ike you see was "in" with Wendel and Thomas. I.e. he was an ass-kisser. Ike seemed to take offence to the fact that Chris had somehow managed to get himself booked in the main event, which is peculiar since Chris was nothing more than a mid-card wrestler during his entire stint in cWo so as to avoid suspicion. However, Ike was angry, grrr, that the "Christmas Clock" wasn't being put to better use, namely being given to his good friend and soon to be cWo "superstar" The Superstar for his big debut. Ike cried to Wendel and Thomas about Chris getting things he didn't deserve and of course word got back to Chris. Chris was an angry young man. But in an attempt to keep his roster happy and prevent a mutiny after certain individuals joined together to launch the 2002 "We Don't Like You Chris" Rally, Chris appeased Ike by handing over the precious clock for The Superstar to use. That segment bombed by the way.

The cWo took a break for Christmas but when it came to the 11th edition of Paranoia at the start of January 2003, there was something wrong. Chris had stopped informing Wendel and Thomas what to do! Wendel and Thomas had no idea what was going on. In a panic, they gave control of the cWo to Ike Rogers and whyttrash, even though Chris was sitting idly by with a smirk on his face thinking about brunch. It was then in an ironic twist of fate that things backfired. Ike and whyttrash ran one edition of Paranoia together and it was terrible. In a blind panic they unwittingly gave control of the cWo to none other than Chris Messiah once again. Chris locked himself away in his old and now new office and laughed until the sun came up. Then he bought a race car. He wasn't laughing for long however because once word got out that Chris and his newly appointed Chief of Staff Colin Gear were in charge, the prices of the company's shares fell to crazily low numbers and the company went bust. Which was strange because cWo wasn't even on the stock market. Oh the irony! Chris Messiah was the brain-box behind the rise of the cWo, but also the fall. All because at first nobody knew it was actually him that was in charge. On seeing his company in ruins, Chris held an emergency meeting with Colin and they came to the conclusion that the only thing to do was to sell, sell, sell! They received an offer in February 2003 that was simply too good to be true and they sold the cWo and all its trademarks to Marcel McMonkeybusiness and the cWo was gone forever.

Chris decided that he was too old to be pretending to be a wrestler, so he hung up his e-boots. Then he took them down again and joined the International Wrestling Association with his good chum Colin Gear. They wreaked havoc in IWA, as Chris won the IWA World Heavyweight championship and Colin won a match or two. Then they decided to leave after one of the roster was racist and homosexualist to them in the locker-room.

Chris once again reared his ugly head in thReat in May 2003. He debuted by telling everybody that he was going to change thReat for the better, yadda, yadda, yadda. He had been listening to the Polyphonic Spree a lot during this month. Chris' star rose and rose and rose in thReat, as he eventually won the thReat International championship. He couldn't have done it without the guidance of his old C-Team ally, Joe Soap, who managed him to victory. Unfortunately, the wheels fell off thReat in September 2003 and Chris decided to call his wrestling career to a close. He had amassed a large amount of unreturned championship belts from the various promotions he had walked out on or that had closed, and he was pleased.

But then that little voice in his head told him to join All-Star Championship Wrestling. That voice was actually Colin Gear. Chris turned up in ACW and had a memorable feud with Phil Atken and a forgettable feud with one of Kamlesh's 17 dozen characters. Chris won the ACW Scorpion Fighting championship which he replaced with the thReat International championship because he had never defended it because thReat closed so soon after he won it, and he felt it was his greatest achievement ever. Fate dealt Chris a terrible hand in ACW in June of 2004, when in a steel cage "Person Who Fails To Win Is Retired FOREVER" match, Chris fought former cWo Television champion Phil "Sir Sexyalot and The Smartest Man in Wrestling plus a Whole Chicken" Atken to a creditable draw. This of course meant that both of them had to retire from wrestling. The match was a Match of the Year candidate according to some guy, and was Chris' finest ever effort. Chris, being the admirable person that he is, stuck to that stipulation and retired from the ring. Phil was of course back in ACW a few weeks later begging for his job back. Chris took the moral high ground and never wrestled again. What a guy.

And then one day a year or so later Chris decided to go back to his roots and join a redneck wrestling promotion, aptly titled Deep South Wrestling. And they all lived happily ever after.

Other Federations: Great Plains Wrestling (July 2000 - October 2000), World Championship Wrestling Federation (October 2000 - January 2001), International Wrestling Corporation (February 2001 - April 2001), British Wrestling Corporation (April 2001 - August 2001), Titanium Wrestling (August 2001 - September 2001), Icon Wrestling Federation (January 2002 - February 2002), LOSER (May 2002 - June 2002), Excite Pro Wrestling (June 2002 - July 2002), Main Event Wrestling (July 2002 - August 2002), Championship Wrestling Organisation (September 2002 - February 2003), International Wrestling Assocation (April 2003 - May 2003), thReat (May 2003 - September 2003), All-Star Championship Wrestling (April 2004 - July 2004)

Other Federations Awards:
GPW World Heavyweight champion x1,
IWC Atlantic champion x1, International champion x1, Tag Team champion x1
IWC Hall of Fame
BWC Commonwealth champion x1
cWo Rising Star champion x1
EPW Hall of Shame
IWA World Heavyweight champion x1
thReat International champion x1
ACW Scorpion Fighting champion x1

Style: Technical (Bret Hart)